In the dead of the night.

Things are going to get worse before they get worse – Lily Tomlin




I have always known that pearls are born of oysters but I didn’t until recently know exactly how that happens. Turns out a pearl originates from a grain of sand. When a grain of sand finds its way into an oyster’s shell its jagged edge hurts the oyster so much that it begins to secrete a substance to coat it. It is from this coating substance that a pearl is formed. What starts out as an irritation eventually turns into a precious gem. The oyster-assuming it has a mind of its own- could have chosen to whine and resign itself to the pain that the grain of sand causes. However it takes the harshness dealt to it and turns it into something wonderful.

Life is pretty much the same. As you go through life you will be at either of 3 stages; going through a problem, emerging from one or coasting in between problems. Before you call me a pessimist, when I say problem, I use that term in its loosest meaning. So the magnitude of the problem is irrelevant whether it’s where to get money for your next mortgage payment or a dress for Friday’s party is not in question. Of importance is your attitude towards your situation and the realization that life will be full of unending challenges. We can choose to look at these as the things that we encounter to break our spirit or as the things that refine us into better people.

My mother’s slogan in life is, no situation is permanent. Even the gravest of problems shall come to pass. We can choose to learn a lesson from the experience or we can whine right through it. In which case we end up at the same place we started. Problems came about to bring change, change brings about growth and growth makes us better people.

Irrespective of what stage of the problem cycle you are in, it is your attitude and reaction that dictates your outcome. If you are in between problems and you decide to sit and sulk as you wait for the next problem to land, trust me you will be depressed. Guaranteed, nothing will ever go your way and the entire world will always be in a conspiracy to bring you down. When your next problem or challenge comes around, it will without a doubt break your back. Life ends up being a blur of dark and cursed days. On the other hand if you ride your problems big or small like waves delivering you to sunny side of life, life ends up being such a breeze.

Accepting that no single day in our lives will ever go by without having to face a challenging situation, does good for the soul. Looking for a solution other than focussing on the problem keeps us a day further from the grave. Like someone said, “When it gets dark enough, you can see the stars.”